Life never turns out the way you plan

If you had asked me in 2000 where I thought I´d be in five years, my answer would not have been "In Sweden". I thought I´d continue my travels all over the world. So many places to see and so little time. But just think how much person can change in a few years. My thinking has changed, from thinking about nothing but new ecxiting countries, to my family for example.

I belive a lot has to do with the birth of my niece. After she came to be, I wanted nothing but to be able to see her more often. And you start to think about your own family situation, I might not want babies right now, but when that day comes, where do I want to have them? Where do I want them to grow up? the answer was easy, close to home. So a seed starts to grow, " is this really what I want to do for the rest of my life, go from place to place live in a suitcase pretty much, see everyone back home maybe twice a year, miss yet another birthday, wedding, funeral, baby being born, X-mas. Is it still worth it?" I guess the answer was no...

I haven´t written anything about what really happened with S, I felt (and still feel) it was between the two of us and the reasons for the breakup was nothing I wanted to put on display. Lets just say it was a very difficult decision to make and very hard since it was MY decision in the end. It´s been a rolercoaster ride since I got home, (well way before that as well) But it´s starting to slow down now.

It feels right to be living in Sweden again although people might think and ask; "well for how long are you gonna feel that way, you´re such a Vagabond, you won´t settle down you´re too restles." Well, for all those people I guess I just have to prove them wrong. :) In the end it doesn´t matter what they think, it´s what I feel is right for me. I might miss the ocean and the beach, but there is nothing that says I can´t still travel even if I don´t stay and live there.

Life never turns out the way you plan it, that´s why I never plan to far ahead in the future. Something always comes up that changes everything. You only live once so one day at a time. :) I just read Marian Keyes´ "no dress rehearsal" and it puts your life in perspective. Like don´t wait to do that thing you´ve always wanted to do (bunjy jumpinganyone?) next week it might be too late. But I´ll stop now before I get too philosofical and lecturing. :)